RHOADES ONE HOUR LATE TO HONOR VETERANS ON 11:11:11/11/09

Achtung! President (Oops, I meant Acting President) Doug Rhoades called the meeting to order on this Veterans Day at the eleventh minute of the twelfth hour of the eleventh month of the ninth year of the twenty-first century.

Doug reminded everyone that on this reverent day we should each give thanks to every veteran we meet. 

Good job of filling in for Whatsername, Doug.

NEWS FROM THE
POLIO FRONT LINES

Jennifer Strong read an e-mail from President Nanette Dutcher and family, in which she told of the trials and tribulations of participating in a BIG Rotary Party in Africa ... Oh, and by the way, she also participated in a day of Polio inoculation.
 

Dennis Fordham led the invocation.   We had a moment of silence for all of those departed veterans who served this country so faithfully in the past and present, and for whom we owe so much.  The club also expressed gratitude for Hugh Mackey's recovery from knee surgery.

Has anyone heard from  Laurel Groshong?  I hope she is recovering well from her terrible injuries.  Perhaps someone could update the club next week.

Rotary Songbird Janel Chapman led us in an absolutely unforgettable, memorable rendition of some song I can't remember the name of.

Dan Christensen brought Larry Hurst as a guest.  Larry is the primary Physical Therapist at Clear Lake Physical Therapy, and the person who is putting Dan's wife, Barbara, back together after her recent Rotator Cuff surgery.

Michelle Chapman, who has logged more work hours at Rotary events than many Rotarians, was a guest of her sister, Janel Chapman.

SUNSHINE REPORT

Dave Herrick, who often refers to himself as "Mr. Sunshine, Himself", offered the following Rotarians their fifteen seconds of fame, in exchange for huge donations to the club.

Don Lange, who tried to skip out on the report last week, was caught this week and honored for 37 years as a Rotarian.  That bears repeating: 37 years a member of the Lakeport Rotary Club.
 

Pam Cochran and Tom Lincoln
were honored in absentia for birthday and wedding anniversaries, respectively.  I'm sure Dave will get their attention next week.

MISSING!
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?

Family and friends of a Lakeport man have reported him missing to authorities.  Friends report that although there continue to be occasional reported sightings of Jose Escalante, (pictured above for those who forgot what he looks like), he has been AWOL for months from Rotary Meetings.  Foul play is suspected.  Friends say Escalante would never have stayed away from Rotary this long, and are worried he may have fallen in with Realtors and other undesirable, and unscrupulous characters.
 

TWINS, SEPARATED AT BIRTH, ARE REUNITED AT ROTARY MEETING.

THERE WERE PLENTY OF TEARS and excitement to go around at the Rotary Meeting on Wednesday, November 11, when Carlos Fagundes and Lowell Grant, pictured above, (I'm not sure which is which) were tearfully re-united, 45 years after being separated at birth. 

The men accidentally showed up at the same Rotary Meeting and noticed they looked alike.  "It was just like looking in a mirror", the men said simultaneously.

Lowell said he just knew all his life that there had to be, somewhere, someone like him, who shared his deepest, most innermost, views and thoughts.  "I never gave up searching, and now this proves it". 

Carlos frowned noticeably at the above comment.  Carlos, on the other hand, said he always thought he was "special", and now that this has happened, he is very disappointed.  "I feel violated."  he groused.

Asked if they thought this would lead to a lasting bond between them, Lowell said, "Oh, yes, definitely!"  Carlos said, "Forgedaboudit!"
 

Art Mann, now that he has so much free time on his hands, was stiffed for the job of Detective again this week.    And so he took it out on the hapless members of the club and abused the position.  Afterward he was heard to mumble, "That felt good, I haven't thrown anyone in jail for a week!"

Dan Christensen was appropriately fined for urging a bunch of hyped up sailors from his Alma Mater in Annapolis, MD, as they mercilessly beat up a group of student priests at a convent in Michigan.

Lowell Grant was fined  for his Op Ed piece, (heavy on the OP, light on the ED), prompting his demand that Gary Dickson pay him $5 a week to cover his Rotary fines.  Upon learning it was up for bid, Steve Davis offered Gary $10 a week to keep Lowell out of the paper.

Jan Parkinson was fined for not knowing the words to "My Country Tis of Thee".  Oh, yeah, that was the memorable and unforgettable song that Janel lead us in.

Clara Dykema was welcomed back from her trip to Puerto Vallarta, where she just sat around drinking and reading six books.  Am I the only one who thinks she could do that at home and save the travel bucks?

Carlos Fagundes was caught stiffing Kenny Parlet by not taking Kenny's free meat.  Isn't that just like Kenny.  Usually he's complaining about getting ripped off, now he's complaining about not getting ripped off.

Jennifer Strong got fined for posing for the statue in the table in the back of the room, but then there was something about needing two Squashes ... I decided not to go there.
 

BRAGS AND JOKES

Not finished, Jennifer Strong then told how her son, Gabe, attempted once again to prove Darwin's Theory of 'Survival of the Fittest', by attempting to inflict great bodily injury upon himself with a #2 pencil.

Fred Christensen bragged about a former Rotary Exchange Student from France, Valerie Auttisier, who he and Helaine once hosted, a number of years ago, recently contacted him from Mongolia, China where she was traveling.
 

Stand-In President Doug Rhoades introduced Lowell Grant who,
in turn, introduced the speaker for today, himself.

Lowell gave a great presentation, sharing the Rotary Video Magazine article on "Women in Rotary".  Since the decree to allow women in Rotary in 1989, there are currently 187,000 plus women members of Rotary, including 63 current District Governors.

Following the presentation, Club members sat around reminiscing about the "good old days".  No, not before women became involved, but in the twenty plus years the Lakeport Rotary Club has allowed women members.

Judy Luchsinger was asked what it was like being one of two women in the club in 1989.  I thought she showed a lot of class by saying she hadn't noticed she was the only woman in the club, she was just a Rotarian like everybody else.   

The Lakeport Rotary Club has had many outstanding woman members.  Many of them have gone on to greater things, and some of whom have gone on to be some of our best Presidents. 

DISCLAIMER:
No animals, including Elks, Moosses, or Lions, were harmed in the making of this Rotagram.